This makes me realize how little I know about Dubai — how little I know about the Middle East in general. I have decided to read up. How else will I be able to have any kind of intelligent conversation with Jack? (What I know about motorized vehicles you could put in a gel cap.)

Dubai, I’ve learned, is the most populous city in the United Arab Emirates. It is the capital of the Emirate of Dubai, the most populous of the country’s seven emirates. You may need a magnifying glass to locate them on a globe.

How did Dubai get its name? Perhaps from the Arabic word “daba,” meaning creeping or crawling, in reference to desert locusts. The last big infestation of these locusts was in 2020, according to social media at the time, although government authorities downplayed these reports, attempting to allay anxiety on the part of residents and potential tourists by saying that the insects were merely blown through by high winds. Plagues of locusts have been documented in the general area since Biblical days.

Are locusts grasshoppers? Yes: all locusts are a kind of grasshopper, but not all grasshoppers are locusts. Locusts, while usually solitary, sometimes gather in huge swarms and defoliate plantlife for miles around wherever they happen to land, but other grasshoppers remain solitary, preferring to just hop about by themselves.

All right, I’m pretty sure none of the above would be of interest to Jack.

I do think that Jack would be interested in traveling to Dubai, however. I have fortunately managed to find a list of important rules itemized by the Dubai government for tourists to the city, which I will briefly outline here, as follows.

“Before you visit Dubai, there are a few things that you should never take for granted. You must have heard about how strict the policies of Dubai are or many other horrifying stories. But the picture is not the way it seems. Dubai is a place of fun and enjoyment for tourists, especially when it comes to dune buggy rides,” the directive begins, encouragingly.

It then goes on to Important Rule No. 1, wear appropriate clothes:

“It is strictly against the laws of Dubai if you reveal clothes in public or even wear clothes that are less than your knees. UAE is a country that is not democratic, it follows the Islamic and as well as sharia laws, therefore, it is a compulsion on you to wear appropriate clothes, and do not forget to cover your shoulders too. This should be no problem for Jack, as he prefers T-shirts and baseball caps, although he will have to leave his shorts at home if they are “less than his knees.”

Important for Jack will be Prohibition of Loud Music: “Loud music is completely prohibited in public areas. People coming from western areas consider this thing completely fine and they like to use loud music in public areas. Well, this is not acceptable in Dubai.” Earbuds, Jack, if you must.

Now here is a rule that any adults who might happen to be accompanying Jack will do well to keep in mind: No Swearing.

“People who are visiting Dubai for the very first time must know that swearing is Dubai in not a good act. Dubai is a country where the laws are Islamic and these laws are very sensitive in nature. Therefore watch your language before you say something. It is not necessary that what you consider fine in your country would also be fine in Dubai.”

The list also warns to avoid Dubai summers: “Everything is perfectly fine but not the summers. The summers of Dubai are highly crucial. They are very intense and extreme that sometimes become impossible to tolerate.” I think this should be taken into account even for a boy who grew up in Southern California.

These are just a few of the many cultural differences that Jack will be experiencing when he visits Dubai. But I’m sure he’ll be way ahead of me.

Have a good week!